Ballroom Dancing v. Caregiving

You are a mother or a father, a son or a daughter, an employee or a homemaker. These roles and relationships are such a part of us that we seldom give them much thought. We simply accept them – until Alzheimer's disease causes them to change. And with this condition, certain changes in roles and relationships are to be expected. A once-independent spouse or parent may have to accept help for the first time in his or her life. A child may have to support the parent who has always supported him or her. These adjustments can be difficult to make, especially at first. But you can make adjustments that benefit both of you if you keep your partnership in mind.

The changing relationship between the person with Alzheimer's disease and the caregiver is a lot like the relationship between two ballroom dancers. When a couple dances, one person is the leader and the other is the follower.

In your relationship now, the caregiver may have to do a little more leading and less following. And the person with Alzheimer's disease may need to find a way to follow that is comfortable.

Fortunately, Alzheimer's disease usually progresses slowly, and in most cases you can shift your roles little by little. Being flexible is required. That is usually true for successful relationships. So, if you can stay flexible, you are likely to find ways to be close to each other. And that is staying connected.

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